Did you just get a DUI Were you…

Did you just get a DUI? Were you told you had to attend AA meetings?
This has been ruled in the 9th Court of appeals that AA is too much like a religion and therefore they can not send you there. Neither can your parole office, neither can the judge.

Ask for an alternative, like
Smart Recovery meetings
Ration Recovery
SOS
WOmen for sobriety
CBT treatment

No Labeling alcoholic at the first two.
None are powerless based
None of the above have crazy sponsors who belittle you and tell you what to do and who to date or marry.
None ask you to clean up the poop in their back yard!

PLease please know your rights. AND DO NOT TRUST people in AA because you think they are trustworthy. THEY ARE NOT!

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12 thoughts on “Did you just get a DUI Were you…

  1. Ela- Almost all people that are in a cult-dont believe they are in a cult. You could still be in one and not realize it. Two wrongs dont make it right. You pick your battles. We have picked this topic as an important one to fight. That does not mean that the situations you discribed in your were handled the right way.There is tons of issues with protecting children and the shortcomings of Social Services.
    That does not make our cause any less meaningful. Many people in AA are in denial to what is going on around them. It does not mean it is not happening. We have PROOF that it does. So just because you did not “see” things does not mean it is not happening,or that it is not happening in other rooms.

    You mention some members are outed for certain behaviors in AA. True-Sometimes. It is not happening enough-period.

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    1. Saftey- First,
      Well I’ll say it again and again. I do not feel I am in a cult. You say you have proof? I’m not going to get into a long entry but I’ve seen alot myself and I’ve spoken about this in PRAASA 2009. I hear and know what the subject is here. You reacted very on the defense but that’s your issue. I have a right to speak and give my opinion. Like I said again seems that this whole subject has taken a turn and don’t know for who’s best interest really? I expressed my ideas re; A.A. being worldwide and no one addressed that? I suggested going to the districts, forums, other A.A. communities and I haven’t heard anything re; that. People are on the radio now, talking about first amendments rights etc. Like is this is a political battle of somesort. I feel if A.A. is not for you then leave. Simple as that. Seems we all want to hear horror stories of rape, abuse, stalking etc….. and NO! before you answer that I don’t take the subject litely because I was abused as a child. And if it wasn’t for me being here I’d still be an angry woman harping on what happen not knowing how to move on from that. And yes I do believe in God but I respect people enough not to shove it down their throat.
      At my home group we close with the Lord’s prayer to some that’s offensive and they stay apart or leave. Those who want to participate gather and do their thing. Could I do that at church of any Christian denomination? I’ve been in groups where the men talk about their sexual adventures and look at the women as like that’s supposed to impress somebody? At times it’s been outright disgusting. What do I do I don’t visit those groups. If there’s young women I tell them what group is a little better. I can’t make them go or do anything. I am a mother and a grandmother and I would not like these things to happen to my loved ones. I knew a young man that commited suicide he had issues that A.A. could not resolve for him. And that was his only way out. I do not like to see these things happen I am sensitive to this topic. But I know that I cannot play God,
      I don’t have that power. But I do have a heart and I have a voice and when it’s time to speak up I do.
      If I was anykind of cult fanatic I would made comments about the Big Book a long time ago.

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      1. ela, I suggested going to the districts, forums, other A.A. communities and I haven’t heard anything re that.

        SO we did try that. WE went to meeting to get it on the agenda. and they said NO. we went to WEstside District. They shut us down. ANd it was never really discussed in a adult way at The Area level either.
        WE wrote 2 long letters to NY, no response. I know a board member that the board made him wait a year to read his 7 page letter on Minor safety member safety.

        The board asked the GSO employees to see how the fellowship felt about this. They refused. WE put on 2 workshops. More workshops are happening around us.
        This is a huge problem. My little pamplet is not enough.
        It has to be a collective effort. ala catholic church sex scandel.

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      2. ’ve been in groups where the men talk about their sexual adventures and look at the women as like that’s supposed to impress somebody?

        That is just disgusting!

        The Criminal behavior we have uncovered is DISGUSTING!!!! ANd I will not leave until enough people are spreading the word…inside.
        The media can expose the rest.

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  2. ela,
    also judges are not sentencing the public to where ever you were talking about. Pedophiles, Sex Offenders and murderers are sitting neck and neck with innocent moms and college kids. This is NOT OKAY.
    WHen AA started and for decades this did not happen. But AA never set up safety measures after they got in bed with Wardedns, Prisons, and rehabs

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    1. Massive Attack, I totally agree judges don’t give a hoot. it’s all about money in all aspects. Court system, deficit even politics. I feel we are left to fend for ourselves. A.A. is wordwide. I’m sure you know this. OK here in the U.S.A. people are mandated because of the whole MADD and also it’s very luctrative. That’s the reality. But take into consideration for a moment. A.A. is in Canada, Europe, Mexico, Latin America, as I said worldwide. And I’ve had the pleasure of mtg people from all over. I ask about these issues and yes the 13th stepping does accure but it seems people look out more for one another. I read the Grapevine where I read stories of recovery both english and spanish. And yes usually when these issues have come up people talk to the person or persons and basically ask them to leave. Their outted so to speak . let’s talk to the Armenian community, Asian. Los Angeles is multiculture maybe they have an opinion or suggestion that can help.

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  3. ela,
    you have a right to your opinion, and your saying it here. But the problem I see and Hear is that there are not enough good people in certain meetings to be there for the new vulnerable women or man for that matter.

    I have learned a HARD serious lesson to not trust someone in AA faster, or sooner , or more because they are in AA and I might think they have morals , principals that they are living by.

    I will stand by what I am saying here. I was disgusted by how my area, and district handled the matter on sexual predators in Meetings. How could anyone not want to warn people about safety.

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    1. Yes we do not have all the answers to everything. All we can really do to pass the information in hopes that it subsides and these “predators” get the message. That this we will not tolerate it here! I wonder if this has been happening within A.A. I can just imagine what takes place in the rooms of Sex Anonymous. I’m sure people that have these other issues go in their just to do more of the same. Unfortunately people that come in with other issues cannot treat their issues in A.A.
      Example, if I have a issue with food A.A. is not gonna help me. Especially when we have coffee and cookies like if it’s gonna run out. So I myself have to be conscious of what I’m doing for my own recovery. Even in PRAASA not alot of people stayed behind to get involved or know more about the subject. I know because I stayed to talk and find out about this. Even the women didn’t seem that interested. i know alot of oldtimers that got stuck in the 50’s and their way of thinking is totally backwards. I don’t waste my time with those folks. I do stay around and talk to the new people. I’m involved in service in A.A. so i visit alot of groups and I talk to new people I see more or less what type of meeting it is. The other day for example this women took her teenage son to her mtg.?? He had his Ipod whatever but still. I’m there thinking this kid is old enough to stay home.
      And so it goes on . I don’t have the power to stop everybody. But I do use the tools that are given to express how I feel and my own ideals. Like the podium, our bulletins etc… I’ve been to Young People in A.A. and I see alot of young vibrant people there. There will be another convention this year at the Woodland Hills Warner in the Valley. I’ll post the info. I’d like to go and talk to some of the folks there and get their opinion. Since they are the new blood that will continue with this fellowship. Goodluck in PRAASA! I still believe in my heart A.A. has helped me and open the door
      for my personal recovery. I do other things other than A.A. more and more people are going out for additional help. And that’s a positive additude. Let’s stay strong and keep passing the information.

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      1. Im so glad you are there to do the work you are doing. Maybe I will go where the young people are although many of them
        still want to act out sexually, so they are refusing to look at this problem. Please post this event! YP events are very culty I felt when I
        went to San Diego last year. Just saying…

        But if one Predator is topped your work, my work is worth it.

        Good luck! and keep us posted.

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  4. I’ve been reading this blog since it started. And just as you express your ideals, thoughts, ideas etc. I have the same right. You say people in A.A. cannot be trusted? Who are you to say that. Why blame everything that happens to A.A.? I mean if we sit and make a list of all the things that happen in our lives it would be endless. Stuff happened to me as a child and when I reported it to my school counselor the system failed me and no one reported it to the authorities. Before that I was also taken to a hospital because my mother suspected sexual abuse and again the social worker there did nothing. What I do believe is that we all are held accountable. I am a mother and grandmother and I am sensitive to these situations but as a society we are all held accountable. I’ve been at grocery stores where the minors are there hoping to get someone to buy them booze. Shame on the people who buy it. Because their adults. Alot of people don’t even comprehend that their responsible once they buy the booze. When I’ve seen that I go in the store tell the manager or security. But who takes the time to do that.? Even as simple as to go to my grandson’s school mtg’s the director is surprised at the fact that people can’t leave their cell phones enough to kiss their kids goodbye… ;{ again I say when your at a mtg share from podium, talk to new people, make them aware of their surroundings. As a woman I do this when vulnerable people come in and they have that terrified look.. So again when I go to A.A. functions I talk to people, share my concerns but I don’t see any of the things I read on here. I wouldn’t join a CULT! I’m still rebellious that way. I have found a HIGHER POWER though and if that’s a crime then I guess I’m guilty.

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    1. Ela- you ask massiveattack who is she to make the statements she is? REALLY?
      If you have been following her blog like you say-then you would know she has been in AA for decades. I think that gives her the right. She has first hand knowledge and experience.
      Do you think she is trying to make AA safer because she has nothing better to do?
      There are sexual predators and felons etc in both AA and NA. The problems are getting worse as the courts are mandating more and more people to AA/NA than ever before.

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