In the 1970’s there was an AA member named Doug Allman age 26 in Kailua, Hawaii who 13 stepped many young woman. I was 18 and barely aware of what AA and its culty culture was all about. I was one of many young woman he 13 stepped over the next decade or two. So, were you one of the 500 or so woman sexually harassed by him? He played guitar, sang Kenny Loggins songs, drove a black convertable, had long wavy brown hair, a beard, could massage you while you discussed the Big Book, he knew the program in and out and he worked for a Drug rehab program in Honolulu. Although in his early years he was not highly educated, it was later he got his degree. SO in the early years he used the fact that he in was in AA/NA to throw his weight around. Basically no dates for free sex for mr AA. Better know as the non relationship man.
He would make friends with newcomer women coming out of St Francis Women Alcohol Treatment Center in Honolulu. He would move them into his place for about 6 weeks, get sick of them then throw them out when he was done with them.
He was a user. Many oldtimers knew what he was doing. A few confronted him. Most blamed the young women and asked them the stupid AA question of the year. “What’s your part in it”. Looking back now, I realized I was 18 …he was 26. He was 5 years sober. I had 2 weeks. I knew nothing about AA.
38 years later I realize I had no part in it. I was young. I was naive. I wanted to hang out with people who didn’t drink. WHAT A PRICE TO PAY. I should have become a Muslim or a Buddhist. Oh well.
If you were 13 stepped by him or any man or women back in the 1970’s and 80’s, or any time in this century, by a person who was well respected, had 5 or more years clean time/sober, was older then you were, we would love to hear your story, how you coped and how you are today. Oh yea, and have you too left AA/NA.
There is a Documentary Film dealing with this subject in the making. There is also a journalist interested in any stories to be told. Up front, close and personal….no hiding in the shadows anymore . No anonymous Bullshit anymore. No using the AA name to play these games of harassment and sexual predation under the radar of made up spirituality.