Are you Unhappy With AA or NA meetings today?

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WHY?

What’s  going on there that was not going on in the 1970’s?

Are you aware that Drug Courts began in 1989 in Florida and then in 1990 in California and then it all began, the dumping of some dangerous criminals in AA and NA?

Is AA safe today?

Do you feel its a real program? WHY?

They read at every meeting that  it’s a fellowship of men and women…do you feel its still a fellowship?

Why does the judicial system, health insurance, rehabs, lawyers and judges call AA a “program” ?

Isn’t it just a laypersons support group? A fellowship? Yes it is.

If it is a Drug Treatment Program then it needs to be regulated by the state as such. So which is it?

Do you feel the steps are helpful? Why?

Do you know that no  one is in charge in an AA meeting…that it’s run by ordinary people who are not trained in any way.

Are you aware that AA/NA have been deemed highly religious in 25 states in the USA and you can not be court ordered there?

Why do people trust AA members so quickly even though they are strangers?

Are you aware that the courts are sending sex offenders and violent offenders to both AA and NA meetings?

45 thoughts on “Are you Unhappy With AA or NA meetings today?

  1. Hi! I met a guy in AA and we broke up around 2008. This ex stalked me by hacking into my Facebook account with two of his friends and others. They broke into my car repeatedly and gang stalked me. His friends put racist white body figures underneath my door etc. I reported them to the police. This ex is a violent sociopath that raped his sister! He’s a dangerous predator. He scans the rooms to hustle and prey on women.

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      1. He continued to stalk and harrass me i never reported the sex assault but for 5 years he continued to stalk send innapropriate text messages and sent lewd pornographic photos i filled charges for the lewd photos i went to 3 differnt police jurisdictions finally one city took my case and the defendant was charged with disorderly persons and had to pay a $250 fine. Yes thats it $250 to rape me

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  2. I’ve about had it. Some of us have been trying to turn things around so that the meetings are more about the steps and the solutions than letting people -INCLUDING non AA members use the meetings as dumping grounds and gripe sessions and pity parties. You would not believe the resistence and anger that AA’s have about that suggestion. They seem to care less about the new people coming in trying to get sober than having their 10 minutes of drama every meeting. Long time AA’s defending the ‘right’ of even non AA members to come in and ‘share’. Why do we now even have to listen to the overeaters, workaholics, alanons, AA family members and now even self harm/sucidal addicts share in OUR meetings? People are hostile to us – say sarcastic things to us in the meetings and from what I’ve heard while we are not there. In one meeting a coyple of us wanted to talk about the steps and the solutions, and one member started saying ‘Rule 62!’. The steps are now labeled as Rule 62?

    No one wants to talk about the solutions in the Big Book; just about their own stuff, their own drama, and their own philosophies, and their own BS. I think to them it must be like being onstage for 10 minutes. They get attention and free coffee. Now we have 2 self harm addicts- cutters coming sharing even in closed meetings. I’ve had enough.When the AA’s I used to think understood the purpose of the meetings defend the non AA’s so called right to share in our meetings and bring their dramas into our rooms- its gotten bizarre.. The newcomer is just a nuisance.I’m done with these narcissistic asses.

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    1. hi bee Gee- Sorry to hear this is happening. I hope you can figure it out. I have a lot of problem with how any 12 step group is run today. I think many old timers are very rigid and stubborn and the welcoming factor is long gone from AA. There is no such thing as self harm addicts. Those girls need to be seeing a therapists and or psych. This is a perfect storm for non professionals to be telling mentally ill people what to do.
      I am pretty sick of even the steps. If you look at them they are not very productive. I was not powerless. I was not insane, and Bill just made that sh*t up and he took those 6 steps from the Highly religious Oxford Movement and made them into 12 steps to copy other religions. If you still lke AA /NA then change the traditions and throw these people out who have no business in a meeting with people who have a drinking problem. Tell them to see real help aka therapy….a person with a PhD after there name.
      Our entire media, TV and film and culture has been brain washed and convinced about all of this. Im pretty fed up with all of it. Maybe its time for you to move on and leave AA as well. Maybe start something new. Maybe something with no prayers and no steps and no traditions. Just a nice support group for drunks only who want to stop drinking. I think AA has not only stopped flat lining it is down right shrinking. I heard the numbers are down from 1.2 million members in the US & Canada are now at 800,000. I would not be surprised. So many have been leaving in droves and or feeling to small home meetings. Now that’s another option for you.

      You could start your own meeting with 6-10 pp in someone house and rotate. Inviting inly those you know and trust well. Much safer as well.

      hope this helps or I really hope you get what you need and can know that if you don’t like the meeting anymore you don’t have to go and maybe…you don’t need it anymore and you can move on and go live your life like they do in SMART Recovery. Be well! 🙂

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  3. monica- Hi and Welcome ! you said ” I was 13 stepped, harrassed , stalked all in my first 5 yrs of SOBRIETY. I am 12 yrs sober by Gods grace and try to lookout for women to make sure they are aware if problems.My Group does not have enough people that seem to care.Not even safe at meetings hardly at all anymore.Thank you for addressing the problem:
    So sorry to hear you had to endure this for 5 years. Its really messed up and we need to make them implement safety polices and procedures as well as warn the public and Empower current AA members to fight back and not allow this behavior to continue. There are still man y good people in AA. But they need to fix it.

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  4. Well thank god that there are some people who have the courage to change the things they can! The 13th step film is great as it shows AA for what it really is! In todays society why is it run by non professionals and everyone sworn to secrecy? Thats so old school that the organsation needs to make some serious changes if they wish to continue its existance! Bodgy and dodgy is the program of AA! Its defunct and doesn’t work for todays standards and values! Gays and pedophiles are no longer kept in the closet!

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  5. there are real life psycho criminals in narcotics anonymous, that is for sure. they love being felons. god makes all people equal my a**, they should lock up 90% of na members. i don’t care if they’re addicts or not they do the crime they MUST do the time!!

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    1. Oh so you are asking me to change my focus to NA now. Really, ….I’m a bit busy. NA will be addressed in my film but you are my foucs I own AA. You are the fellowship that lies to the world about who you are. You are the fellowship that chnges nothing and thinsk you are perfect. That BB of yours is a joke. write another book that has some real science in it about addiction. 1935 book that was never vetted, never researched….what a fucking con job you have done on 2 generations. Senators buying your bullshit.
      AA would be nothing without Bill Wilson on the cover of the Saturday Evening post and Marty Mann who knew all the high socity rich cats in the country. Rockefeller, Ford, all the guys with big bucks and Rockefeller came from a dry family in Ohio. What a coincidence.

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      1. cheers! LOL all the way to a free life free from AA dogma, Free from the AA cult mind set.

        You are stuck in the mind trap made up sh*t by wacko Bill Wilson. I feel sorry for my friends who still believe this Sh*t.

        No one has every made a film exposing AA and its billshit. No one! AA is not bigger then The catholic Church, aka Max Mea Culpa, The Invisible WAR about rape in the Military and Food INc, which exposed Monsanto. AA is a baby compared to these giants. ALthough AA has become a huge institution like Footabll, even Jerry Sandusky was taken down. The rape and molesting of children will be AA downfall and wrongful death suits to follow from AA people telling those to get off their meds.

        I will not see you in the playground. I saw too many like you at the westside district AA GS meetings on SUnday in that HS in SM. from 2009-2010. What a group of nutbags. Oh yea there were a few nice folks….I still know some nice AA people who are still in it.

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      2. Save a seat for me…why.. I like Smart or SOS or Moderation or Harm reduction meetings. AA is an antiquated BS religion made up to ;like like a treatment program. No thanks! Im free. I spend my time in Nightclubs, piano bars, restaurants , movie theaters, museums, the park, the beach, spas, book stores, walking, riding my bike.

        I spent too many years in those smoked filled rooms, it makes me wanna gag. You guys with your wierdo philosophy about getting angry…

        you are the angriest group of people I have ever seen in one place!!

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  6. why is it that about 1.4 million people are living comfortable lives because of aa and this small iddy bitty little vent rage gossip forum exists to put down aa. there’s predators everywhere.

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    1. Your living in a cave if you are not dead or deaf or blind to know how sexually predatory both AA and NA are right now. They..you AA GSin NY will be forced to make policy re safety around violent pp in AA and sexual harassment and rape. For wrongful death you will be sued and you will lose.

      So do what massive wanted you to do she has a whole list od how AA can make it self better. and printing stories in the grapevine is just not cutting it and wtf is up with printing a magazine with a story about a 13 year old being stalked. Are you just plain stupid? are are you condoning pedophilia. Your We are disgusting by your stupid VO campaign on the grapevine website trying to cover up your shit. Its too late.

      The cat is out of the bag and their are 7 anti AA sites that are raging with the truth about more then all of these issues. Your antiquated unchanged BBis another topic, Cult behavior, Bullying oldtimers, stupid rules, labeling yourselves forever, broken forever, un researched Bull…

      I’ll fix my typos later…

      Go back to your fancy offices in NY AA with its $12,000,000 million dollars and count your dollars cause the gig is drying up. I know members who still go who don’t put a dime in anymore.

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    2. The feeble attempts of Alcoholics Anonymous to try and cover up that the “groups” will do nothing about the predators in AA is being well documented. The September 2013 article “Unacceptable” just doesn’t do it. I tis a story about a 13 year old girl being stalked by a 20 something pedophile. What do you this they did? They covered up the incidents even when it is against the law claiming Tradition 1 and that the groups comes first, not the victim. Her is the audio of it from the AA Grapevine http://www.aagrapevine.org/sites/fileuploads/isovera/drupal6core/AAGV_Sep13_6Unacceptable.mp3.

      “The 13th Step, the Film” has been two years in the making and the original “Make AA Safer” campaign was shot down by the AA fellowship in California and ignored by the Alcoholics Anonymous corporation in New York. Now the GSO is trying to cover up the problems with predators in AA and claim thay are trying to do something about it. It is too little, too late and they still put protecting AA ahead of 13 year old’s being stalked in their meetings.How sick is that?

      Alcoholics Anonymous 2013 Northeast Regional Regional Forum (NERF) holds “Safety in AA- Our Common Welfare” and doesn’t care about the individual being stalked, just the group http://orange-papers.org/forum/node/3927

      Now go talk to your Sponsor. Just remember AA doesn’t care about you, it cares about keeping AA running and finding more prospects.

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      1. I would like to talk to someone who is genuine who attended and see what they discussed and what are their plans to make it safer.

        TALK IS CHEAP!!!!!!

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  7. we were taught to speak in the first personal pronoun “I” not ‘you’…. where did you not learn that….
    bb

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    1. Taught???? What are you ….in first grade? We are all adults here. No talking down to us. abusive AA bullshit back to your meetings where you can continue to abuse other members with talk like this.

      We dont tolerate that here.

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      1. “Unhappy with-” wouldn’t describe it… more like foaming at the mouth and spitting nails over ‘the programs.’

        Massive: Do you mind if I post a link to my book?
        (I sent you an email a couple of days ago)

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  8. HI 50-80

    WOW, that is a really horrible story. Sorry to hear this. This is one of the types of behavior that I saw in different ways when I left. I want to write more …BB tomorrow. Im very sorry this happened to you. I think she should have been screamed at ” He is DEAD” Are you nuts…..my husband is dead!!!

    Its a shame. Im sorry.

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  9. Most of the people I met in “The Program” get SSDI and have kids that other people largely take care of or they live in group homes where it’s like a sober commune. My sponsor was such a person. I could not bring up this “resentment” with her. It seems like there are a lot of state funded job and housing opportunities for those who had prison time, kids, or are on public assistance. It’s getting me frustrated with taking suggestions from people who don’t work hard at full time jobs and just treat other group members as babysitters.

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      1. buddi b yes there are meetings that look nice and professional and the predators who are more criminal or sleazy don’t go to those meetings but Kristine Cass met her killer in an AA meeting near Kahala Mall, a lovely rich neighborhood in Hawaii, and he looked presentable but he was a violent offender who was court ordered there and AA and NA can not help a person with rage or PTSD. In fact AA and NA beliefs around anger and emotions are nuts….make it worse… look at the Petit Killers in CONN.

        But even at those meetings, they still that chapter 5 written in 1939 by wack Bill W who knew nothing about helping anyone but himself to lots of lovely new ladies who looked up to him as some God.

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    1. how about screwed up women with 2-3 years sober trying to get newcomer females to leave their husbands and the women have no income and it’s all the 2=3 year wonder working out her own stuff on the newcomer.

      female predators abound in the rooms.

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  10. Soooooo True. I think that ‘The Program’ has become a warehouse for those who are not able to integrate into society and that is one of the reasons why you see the same people going to meetings day after day after day.

    They may have got sober but they are unable to work so they go and tell everyone else to do what they do without realizing that it is a life without balance.

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    1. so why not go to meetings you like? you are taking their inventory good bad or indifferent. how about you? why are you even there in the first place?

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      1. Buddy boy you speak only in AA rhetoric. Dont you have your own mind or have you been going to AA for too long that you have lost yourself. You are brainwashed.

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      2. I will reply now…. I was away caring for my friends dying husband – he had 32 years sobriety and was active in AA. Not a single one of her AA friends showed up to help her or him. I was not surprised at all.

        As for me…. one of the aa members I used to call friend…. phoned me up and while I was rubbing this man’s dying body to help him be more comfortable…. she was yelling at me for not keeping going the social group (aa meeting) that we had going at my house.

        She didn’t understand that this was never an aa meeting. The fact that there were no dues, no membership list, no name, no registration, no format, didn’t seem to stop her from calling it an aa meeting with all it’s rules and regulations in place.

        It was a group of ladies that got together once a week while my own husband was dying. We would read a paragraph or chapter out of the stories of the big book with my husband. It made him feel like he was maintaining his sobriety but it was not an aa meeting.

        Well…. They wanted to keep it going after he died. Come to my place and sit in the same chairs…. just his would be empty. They ignored how creepy this was. So… to be a good sport I tried it for a while… maybe it would be ok. It’ wasn’t so I put a stop to it.

        Now I’m getting screamed at for taking a group conscience without the group member present. That I can’t do that – it is against aa. And some how they are now denying that ‘The Meeting’ was just a social club to keep my husband feel connected as his body shut down.

        Truth be known…. it was often just a gossip session which my husband also liked. 😉 We would read a paragraph then chat – often pointing out how wonderful it was to be able to do that because it was not an official aa meeting and so we could do things like that.

        Argh……….. I hate aa. It destroys relationships and that’s what I told the lady who was screaming at me for closing down an aa meeting without their consent. I was sooooooo tempted to say. ‘He’s DEAD. My husband is DEAD. Just stop it. You’re getting really creepy. He doesn’t need a Thursday morning meeting any more. He’s dead.’

        50-80

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    2. we are not impressed. Money doesn’t make you a good guy either. We dont care that you are sober either. Are you? Well, we dont care about your “time” either.

      We are reporting facts about sexual predatory behavior, rape and assault in AA and way more then that. You can not stop the river from over pouring. The jog is up and we are like the arab spring. FACE Book and the twitter and 7 anti AA sites are flourishing because we are speaking the truth about AA. AA in NY knows they better get with the program. They are being sued and they will be sued and soon woman will sue men in meetings and men will sue men for ripping them off for tens of thousands of dollars. People who molest children in AA are committing heinous crimes are its getting reported by those members and the NEWS. We are reporting both here and was to help those who want help.

      You dont seem to need help, you are so full of yourself. Go practice your AA humility and be of service and stop turning a blind eye to the sexual perdition …

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      1. AA has had problems for some time and it sickens me that not enough people speak up.I was 13 stepped, harrassed , stalked all in my first 5 yrs of SOBRIETY. I am 12 yrs sober by Gods grace and try to lookout for women to make sure they are aware if problems.My Group does not have enough people that seem to care.Not even safe at meetings hardly at all anymore.Thank you for addressing the problem

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    3. you are delusional too …haha…we don’t care if you own buildings, the Catholic Church owns Madison Square Garden, and most of Wilshire Blvd, they still had to address pedophiles in their ranks and the covering up of exactly that..
      and they still have been forced to change and they were exposed on every News show there is …
      BTW turn off your caps..in blog talk that means YELLING !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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