A Note About Blog Comments

supportStop13StepinAA is a resource for survivors of the rampant predatory behavior that goes unchecked within Alcoholics Anonymous. For the last 30 years, I’ve taken on the largest and oldest alcohol recovery program in the world and, in the process, built an incredible community of safe recovery advocates.

I’ve also become a target for those who, in a misguided defense of AA, aim to discredit and attack me at every turn. You may have seen some of their comments on this blog. In an effort to make Stop13StepinAA a safer place for survivors to find the compassionate community we need to heal ourselves and change the system, we’ve removed some of these comments from the site.

We still encourage you to send in your thoughts–whether they be negative, positive or otherwise–but we will selectively post those responses we find most helpful to our readers who want to stop the 13th step in AA.

Thank you for your support,

Monica

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5 thoughts on “A Note About Blog Comments

  1. The 13 th stepper sexual predator that was highly destructive in my life was actually a woman that I had shown kindness and welcome to when she came to AA a while earlier
    She was ‘high functioning’ as they call it in the world and of mature age
    It just goes to show 13 th steppers come in all shapes and forms
    Being cold hearted herself she didn’t seem to realise that some people actually cared about me and told someone that she pretty much wanted to f… my partner(who was reeling from a number of family traumas)
    She was advised not to go there but quickly invited my partner to her home for ‘ work’…
    ….I guess one thing that upsets me so much about these 13 step predators is that they often operate in areas where there’s no law or anything to protect the people they target
    And they just continue to manipulate and satisfy their sick selves
    I sometimes wish AA had a policy of outing 13th steppers and I often think how at the end of a meeting I would love to announce this woman’s name and what she did
    I really think it could be a deterrent
    I did have the courage to confront her personally after a meeting
    But how many predators have we met who say sure I did this and I’m so sorry and I ll never do it again
    Zero

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  2. To have been able to post part of my story and join this blog has given me a new lease of life as I was in despair
    While some of my AA friends were really helping me I had been given some very twisted AA responses as well
    One lady said I should make ‘amends’ to th 13th stepper ??
    Another said I was ‘blaming’ the 13 th stepper. ??
    Someone else screamed abuse and threats at me
    I received a strange phone call
    Another woman said the 13 th stepper was vulnerable??
    A few others brick walled me
    And I was/am treated with silent violence and total disrespect by someone else
    This is a true example of how some people in AA support a 13th stepper or predator
    Since I have joined this blog my mind has calmed down so much and I feel I will be ok
    Thanks so much and thanks also to Massive for giving me a wonderful healthy reply to my first post
    Pearl

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    1. Pearl- HI…I am not surprised that you were treated so insensitively by some of the AA members. If you read this blog from when it began you will see you are not alone! Again Im glad you feel supported here and I encourage you to speak out and write here and look on the internet for other stories like yours.

      Its disgusting what they said to you .

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  3. HI Pearl and Welcome ! No you are not alone. There are so many of us. As you can see here in the blog. If you want to talk here is my email makeaasafer@gmail.com. Hang in ..but don’t take their sh*T ….SPeak up and speak out. No one deserves sexual harassment and bullying in any recovery community .

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  4. It is a great blessing to find this website as I am going thru hell working thru a situation involving a sexual predator in AA
    It’s great to know I’m not alone
    I don’t have the courage to blog out my story as I have been threatened and fear retribution
    But at least now I know I’m not alone and in the lonely times of which there are plenty I can take comfort in this blog spot
    There are sexual predators in AA wilfully destroying other peoples relationships and lives

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